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Monday, April 01, 2002
This post is also derived from the time I have recently spent at my place of employment: Wal*Mart. I am amazed at the amount of Wal*Mart patrons that cannot operate a pen. Several times today (and previous days, as well) I stood there, staring at some dumb shmuck, watching him struggle with the pen I gave him to sign his check. I watched one man look my pen over for nearly half a minute before he finally asked me how to work it. I simply replied, "You push the end," not know how else to describe the complex series of events that must occur before using a ball-point pen.
"Maybe you just have a difficult pen," you might say in defense of these fuck nuts. But I assure you, my pen is of simple design: It is a mechanical pen that has a "button" on one end that makes the tip protrude out of the opposite end. It is what Mel described as a "clicky-pen." As far as I know these such pens have been around for quite some time, long before I came into existence. It was one of the first deviants of the quill pen (after the pen-and-cap pens) and most likely the first style of the mechanical pens. There are other much more difficult mechanical pens out there. There are the ones that have the "clicky" part near the head of the pen, ones that have multiple tubes of color ink inside (thus more "clickies"), and perhaps the most tricky pen of them all: the pen-that-looks-like-it-has-a-cap-but-you-actually-have-to-twist-it-to-get-the-tip-to-come-out style pen. Boy, now if I'd had one of those I could understand this guy asking me how to work my pen.
After he left, I got to thinking about these types of people, the type that can't work a simple mechanism such as a pen. How do they operate a vehicle? A car has many, many more "clickies" and levers and buttons and knobs than a simple pen. Can this man operate such a complicate piece of machinery?
But while I'm chiding this man for being a complete and utter moron, I should be praising him. It takes balls to admit to someone that you are so incredibly stupid that you can't even operate a writing utensil. Asking me how to work my pen took courage and I applaud that man. *clap, clap* That's me giving you a round of applause, dip shit.
| Mr. McBastard | 4:14 AM | | |
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